Loving them through the longest of days.

January 25, 2016

When the end of January rolls around, I usually feel the need to throw a party…because well, we survived. January is that long month of holiday withdrawal, cabin fever, stir-crazy month that tries to convince you that spring is so very far away. When you have little ones in your care, you have to make the conscious effort to make the most of it, and not let it keep you down.

little one
 

snowfall
 
snow day
 

snow day success
 
babes and horses
 
hot cocoa
 
snow
 siblings
 
brunch
 father son

 

It has been a long month over here with little Rocco being sick back to back (he gets loved on all the time from his siblings which might have something to do with it;)). The result is one sleep deprived mother.  I have learned that it’s basically not safe to speak when you are sleep deprived. Chances are, nothing good comes out of your mouth, and by the end of the day, you are all out of love and kindness. I have realized that you get a really good glimpse of your limitations when you are tired. Am I right?? My greatest pride in this life, and the people I love most are my children. I consider them my most important work. However, sometimes it’s like….so hard to be stuck indoors with them.

So it dawned on me. Often times, the people we love most are the hardest to live with. Whether it be a sister, mother, best friend, husband, or our own children. We love them so dearly, that we are equally frustrated or angry when they disappoint us. For instance, I have three very strong willed children and a docile (so far) chubby baby. They are all extremely different, but each of them have are super sweet with a side of stubborn. We work on it daily, but there were definitely a few mornings last week where I was ready to raise the white flag…….right after Max drew with marker on the wall, and Veronica scowled at me for the 24th time that day. I was so angry that they just wouldn’t get the lesson or cut me a break. The truth is though, it was me that needed a check point. I had run out of patience and love and all those things because you know……sleep deprivation and not enough grace and coffee.

These little babes in my care were given to me to mother. I get the privilege of getting to show them the beauty of the world and all that it holds for them. I get to see them learn right from wrong and choose to use it for good. I have the honor of holding them close when they don’t feel well, encouraging them to conquer their fears, and see their face light up when they realize they have accomplished something new. There are going to be days where they wake up on the wrong side of the bed, and don’t choose the right things to do or say, but in the process of loving them through those tough days, I know my own heart will change. I have a lot of room to grow. These little ones of mine are not meant to be perfect, they are meant to be children. Children have that wonderful uninhibited spirit that loves freely and wildly. They understand love much easier than we adults can. They are quick to forgive and eager to make you laugh, and all in all, they are the remedy to a weary heart. And so, I try again. Not to be a perfect mother, but just the one who loves them to the best she can.

Perspective can do so much for shifting our attitude in the right direction, and so I wrote this out today for me to read and re-read when I have another long snowy or rainy day indoors. Another post for another day….how to take ten for yourself, to re-charge your batteries. Working on that too;)

 

*Photos from our snow day weekend. My children haven’t seen snow in over a year so you can imagine their excitement to see it fall.

 

Leave a Comment

  • I am in awe and quite speechless about the depth, beauty and love in this Post! Wow…just wonderful & heartfelt writing. As A homeschool mother of 3 I felt your words sink deep in my heart and mind.We spend alot of time together everyday. Thanks for this reminder.

  • I was trying to think of something witty to say, but I’ll just say this…. beautiful! ❤️❤️

  • Seeing your family always warms my heart! x

    http://jessicawoods.fr

  • Michelle H

    I think I needed this today. My bebe, 5 months, hasn’t been sleeping well and I have found myself snapping at my older son over little things.

  • oh i am thinking the same
    things so much these days!! and i have half the amount of children!

  • Miranda Staniforth

    Thank you for your thoughtful words. It’s amazing how mum’s can encourage each other to parent with love & grace all over the world. I’ve also found this article helpful as I consider how to keep on striving for graceful motherhood: http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/motherhood-is-a-calling-and-where-your-children-rank

  • Ivey Cullen

    Love this post! So much sweetness in it. Can you please share where you got your crucifix ring that you wear with your weddings rings? I absolutely love it!

    ~thanks!!

  • Pat Schwab

    Anna, I know exactly what you mean. Tiredness can get the best of anyone. All we can do is love them everyday. Pat S

  • Thank you for this beautiful, humbling reflection! I think it is such a good point that you make-trying to love as best as we can, even when we get rubbed the wrong way. Your post reminds me of a semester in college that I spent with my fiance (now husband) in Europe. It was extremely good marriage preparation on so many levels; one of those being that we saw each other at the very worst. Hours stuck on crowded trains, getting lost in big cities, not having showered for days. And even though there were rough times, just trying again to love each other as best as we could 🙂

    • Oh good marriage prep indeed! I remember a semester like that with my now husband. ha ha! We learned so much about communication and the areas we had to improve on;) Thank you AnneMarie!

  • Oooh boy, isn’t that the truth! We all go through it, but I think you get a bigger dose with more little ones in your care! Hang in there, brave mama!

  • And I admire how you are able to take the struggles of every day and use them as raw material for a beautiful and uplifting post. That’s creativity… creating something beautiful even from the days that are hardest.

    • You are so encouraging, and I greatly appreciate that Trish! I think if you don’t take time to reflect on what is happening in a busy life than you can miss the main points;) I have to force myself to step outside a hard day and listen to the lesson. xo

  • Portia Antonio

    You are deep woman! I like it. I stay home with my three little girls, and I have to remind myself that it’s not about a perfect day, but about the relationship. One week we were unsuspectingly drinking decaf all week! That was a rough week. Thank you for your post, it nice to not feel alone in striving!

    • Oh that made me laugh! I can’t imagine! Need my coffee;) You are so right, that relationship is something that cannot be replaced and we only have short years with them to make it count.

  • Such a gorgeous post!

  • Boy… you have eloquently expressed the words my heart feels but my mouth cannot conjure.
    I’m a homeschooling mom of a 10 year old, a 2 year old, a 1 year old, and a 3 month old. My husband left for a work trip yesterday leaving me alone with this motley crew for the next 4 loooooong days. I couldn’t fall asleep until 1230 last night because I’m a scaredy cat when my husband is gone. As I was almost asleep, my husband texted to say he’d arrived. As I almost fell asleep again, the 1 year old started screaming. I comforted her a while. As I almost drifted off again, the baby was hungry. It was 2:30 before I got to sleep. And then the baby woke me up again at 5:30. I am beat today and very, very bratty. I have lacked grace since before the day even started and I feel terribly guilty about it. Sigh. Some days are just so long. Others are short, though, thankfully. I love balance… and my husband. Thankful for his help on a daily basis. It helps balance me out. But mostly, thank God for new mercies every day. Today I was unkind a lot. I am glad I get to try again tomorrow… and that our children are quick to forgive and forget. Such a blessing. I feel you, Sister! I feel you!

    • Viv, it takes quite the bit of endurance to do it on your own. I have been there, and it made me have the utmost respect for single mothers! Even when we are sleep deprived, our children still look to us to be there source of love. Those long days teach us so much about ourselves, right?! ha! But yes, thankful for endless mercy, forgiveness, and new chances. x

  • Beautiful and exactly what my mind and heart needed to read and reflect on, thank you!! Our sweet little girl was born three weeks ago and I am still trying to balance life with 3 children while homeschooling our oldest and fighting fatigue. Comforting to know I am not the only mom who sometimes has those days.

    • Oh Cassie, those first few months with three were the hardest of motherhood for me. It is so wonderful, but it asks of all of your physical, emotional, and mental energy. I hope you have a helping hand sometimes to get a shower and a good nap or a date with the hubby. Those things did wonders for me! Hugs mama.

  • I’ve recently come off social media and it’s soo nice to come here and get this goodness away from the endless scrolling. Thank you for your honesty, wisdom and inspiration. I’m going through the first trimester of my 7th baby and feeling very low due to nausea and food aversion, so I read your first trimester tips and I’m sipping on coke right now (oddly not usually in our house) but will get some chamomile for the rest of the month. Also this post is just so sweet and a good reminder being a mother is an honour and a privilege and they are definitely the remedy. Love your writing! God bless!

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