One Truth: I almost quit blogging every month.

October 23, 2013

Blacks and Neutrals | IHOD

I almost quit blogging every month. Literally….every. month.

Blogging is a funny thing. I love that its allowed me to stretch my creative wings, the opportunities it has brought still makes me pinch myself, and the friendships through readers and other bloggers has changed me for the better. And I mean honestly, no complaints because I get to work from home! If you really want to blog full time you HAVE to be a go getter. You are consistent, you are accessible, you pitch, you receive, etc.

However, you may not guess, but I battle between that line of wanting to live a more private unknown life. To live your life out loud on the blog and social media world through a brand, requires a certain type of energy and focus that can sometimes be totally draining for my melancholic mind! Ha! Its like you are at a month long cocktail party. Granted this can be totally fun, but there are days when I would love to toss the phone and the computer out the window, and close off the internet forever. Its an extreme that will never happen, but I pretend I am so going to do it….

I was talking a little about this last night over coffee with Lesley and Whitney (both whom I have met through blogging believe it or not;)), and it got me thinking more about what the future holds for this space. My children are my most important work and I never want them to be over exposed or feel second to my creative work. I love having this place to document parts of their lives but have heard a few stories that have scared me from sharing too much. When it comes down to it, when the time is right, I will probably cut ties with this place called IHOD and be at peace with it. BUT, for now, I am going to keep enjoying this crazy adventure I somehow tripped and fell into:)

What about you? If you are a blogger what do you think of the whole idea of living publicly? If you are a reader, what do you think of this whole blogging business? I would love to hear:)

Photo by Chelsey Heidorn. Outfit details here.

Leave a Comment

  • I’m with you with the whole chucking the laptop out the window, especially my phone. I want to disconnect but can’t because I don’t want to miss anything, but by doing this I’m likely to miss something in real life. It’s one big weird online vortex. As you know I do it full time too, it’s hard to put it down and night and to be honest I don’t stop. Not good, I haven’t got the balance right but I’m getting there. It’s led to many creative projects and more coming up, but mostly I’ve met people that I may never had done in an office. Some not met but people I admire, I count you as one of them such people. Take it easy this week.

  • Great post. I have to be honest, this is one of my main fears about going forth with blogging. I’m nervous that it may get to be too much and that I will end up having to pull back. But at the same time, boy do I ever love the joy that blogging brings me, every little piece of it and because of that, I’m willing to keep plugging away and just waiting to see how I feel once all is said and done.

  • I guess I’m on the opposite end of where you are. I feel like I’m working so hard to reach my blogging goals that I love and soak up every minute of getting some exposure and growing my blog. That’s not to say you don’t love it too! I understand it’s a fine line of creativity and sharing your life that can be hard to navigate. The problem for me in regards to having kids is that I do view my blog as somewhat of a journal for them to one day look back on. While I don’t want to overexpose them, I do want them to be a big part of it. Regardless, I’m glad you don’t give up every month ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • ME TOO ANNA. me too. especially as william and lindsey get older and more aware of themselves/my blog/their own desire for privacy. i mean, i don’t think their friends read my blog (william and lindsey don’t even read my blog) but what if they did??? i would hate for them to feel like i put too much of them out there. that’s in part why i’m trying to do fashion posts from time to time — i just don’t feel as comfortable sharing about my family in a way i used to. it’s a strange thing.

    • This! yes bridget. feel this way so much lately. i look at past posts sometimes and I can’t believe I shared what I did. I love this space, like you anna because of the same reasons, BUT I’m at a bit of a loss over where to go next.

      thanks for sharing this truth. xox

      • Amanda Marshall

        Yes! Im so with you all on this. Except mine is like every week, ha! Cam talks me back into it everytime. I think a big factor for me is the fact that we’re so far away from so many loved ones that its important for me to share our lives a bit, but at the same time i also want to throw the internet out the window sometimes! But i looove sharing food and creativity through that. You have been a huge inspiration for me and countless others through this space. I am so so glad youve chosen to keep going each month. I would miss you terribly if you didnt!

  • It’s a catch 22. On one hand I am right there with you wanting to share my life, my experiences, my creative talents…and on the other hand I want to hold on to my privacy from prying eyes, negative people and the general population as well. I had a personal blog about my family for years and although I still write about them I do not make it public anymore. I feared that my over sharing and would eventually come back to haunt me. Do I miss sharing with the world…absolutely but instead of sharing my life with the world I chose to share my life and my girls lives with those close to us instead, in personal connections. Like I said I still write about them…just for my own personal memory. It was such a hard decision but in my mind the privacy and peace of mind that I have gotten from it have far out weighted the constant need to keep people informed. I have to admit though I love reading other peoples blogs about their lives, their children their creativeness and inspirations. It’s wonderful to know there are others like me out there. I have enjoyed getting to know you on so many levels that if you did stop blogging it would almost feel like I am loosing a friend, however I completely understand if you stop for a need of privacy. I think in this age of social media, constant facebook, twitter and instagram updates we all crave a little privacy at some point.

  • oh girl. you know i feel you. i feel you you strike a really nice balance. i feel like your home life remains more private than most bloggers (which i admire!) and your creative skills are more on display. sometimes i have pit-in-my-stomach moments before i hit send when my children’s sweet little faces are involved. i don’t want to feel let down if a special moment with them isn’t widely received because it isn’t “styled” enough. i mean, gross. those thoughts and the monthly “cocktail party” (hilarious btw) can be seriously exhausting. there are such great benefits though (working from home, getting to be creative, basically creating our own work each day) that it keeps us keepin’ on. only time will tell! xox

  • I feel soooooo like you! I mean, I’m not a pro blogger, I’m actually on my first year trying to make it. I’ve had success stories and not so good moments, but even so, I find myself thinking about the exposure factor. I’m always asking people where they knew things from and they would say “your blog”. I guess that’s good because people read it, but it scares me a bit ๐Ÿ˜› Positive thinking above all, and remember why you are blogging in the first place! (Oh, and great you put family first! That is a MUST!!)

  • I love your honesty, Anna!! You are so right, and I totally feel you! I love blogging and have enduring the craziness along with a full-time job (have no idea how I do it), and for now, I enjoy keeping my privacy on the internet ๐Ÿ™‚ I know that in time, it may be harder to do that, but I’ll try to hold onto it as long as I can! I completely get how you feel like blogging is a month-long cocktail party – you put that so perfectly! I think a good thing to do is those days you feel like throwing the computer out the window – just take the day off! (or two lol!!) You deserve it!! Enjoy the rest of your day! <3

  • me too! sometimes i’m so inspired and excited to blog and be part of the blogging community but then sometimes i feel like it starts sucking the real life out of me and i’m not focusing on what going on around me in my real life. i’ve definitely taken long breaks which helps me re-focus. it’s definitely funny to think about how long i plan on blogging for. will i still be blogging when i have kids? will blogging stil be a thing or will there be a new think everyone is doing to document their life and use for a creative outlet

  • For a myriad of reasons, more and more often I find people are recognizing me on the street and around my neighbourhood from my blog and that is a boundary line I never considered I would unwittingly cross. It leaves me wondering about the long term life of my blog and the lifespan of my digital life. How does it all progress and, ultimately, end? I have no idea. I’m still loving the ride, and can’t imagine a life without writing, so the end isn’t coming soon. But still, I wonder.

  • Hannah Z-Murasko

    As a reader, I actually don’t read many blogs. In fact Anna, yours is the only blog I consistently read (and not just because we’re related). ๐Ÿ˜‰ I am a huge fan of your work and what you stand for. I love your honesty and openness to the public. However, I am not a fan of blogging in general. I’m not a fan of the internet, social media as a whole or technology for what it is. It has its place and I use it (i.e.-facebook to keep up with family and friends and for my etsy shop). Yet, everyone’s lives are so public now, no one has what I like to call a “real family.” Everyone in the world is their family and there is nothing sacred about their personal real-life family anymore. It’s always nice to read what you have to say about family matters, especially because it helps to know that I’m not the only one with the same struggles. I’ve even thought about going ahead and shutting down my shop because I do feel a shift in how much time I’m spending with Simon…and you mentioned that might happen. As a whole, if you were to give up blogging, I would be 100% in support of it. I would miss it, and I know you might too, but I think it would be for the betterment of you and your family as a whole. But for now, stay strong, enjoy it and I can’t wait for more. As always, just a thought! ๐Ÿ™‚ Much love.

  • When you get to heaven, you are going to see all the good you have done for people as a blogger! It’s just a means to reach out to others whom you’d never meet otherwise. You are so so special and I think people are privileged to come across a person like you in their lives be it via internet or in person. xoxo

  • I’m glad you’re blogging but would totally understand if one day you felt like it was time to close up shop and focus on the family or on other real-time opportunities. I tend to think the social media in general are like a virtual bridge that can open new doors or allow us to meet new people (hello, networking — that’s how I got my job!!!) but I also think that real-time relationships or jobs or opportunities are the treasure at the end of the rainbow. Once we reach that treasure, it makes sense to scale back on the media use. I just think of it as inherently temporary, almost as a means to an end or as a complement or accessory, nothing more. I know we all have real lives and no one lives totally through the social networks… but there are degrees of involvement and reliance, and it seems healthy to me to eventually gravitate toward less virtual life and more real life.

  • Yup, I think about quitting often but not because the publicity of success but the amount of time devoted to a non-paying hobby gig.

  • i hear ya! blogging takes a LOT of work and it’s a huge commitment to constantly post and stay active in the blogging community. i was really sick last year and had to take more time to myself instead of visting a ton of blogs — im glad i did beacuase now i feel better and i realized that your health and family are the most important things. i LOVE blogging for it’s ability to inspire me to be creative and get social and i’ve met a ton of amazing people in real life bc of blogging —but i have had those days where im like “WHAT am i doing?!” ah well take the good with the bad i suppose. xo

  • Anna, I often think about this too. Especially when thinking about having a family…do you want you kids all over the world wide web? I think that you have found a great balance of sharing and not sharing everything. And I feel the same way you do, maybe someday blogging will no longer be something I do but for now I still do love writing.

  • Oh I think this is a hard one. I have a two month old and really truly do not want him to know that I post pictures of him on my blog or to know people swoon over him, etc etc. When he gets older and is more aware this might be harder to do, but I want him to know the value of privacy and to live a normal life. I think with blogging, it’s just one day at a time. ๐Ÿ™‚

    http://www.seashellsandeggshells.blogspot.com

  • I guess live a somewhat “public” life on my blog, social media, etc but I never go too deep. And even though I spill a lot about what I am doing weekly on my blog, I rarely post on my personal FB account. I just do not like the day to day “this is what I am up to now” posts on FB but on a blog, I don’t mind :).

  • i think i’m pretty public (and I don’t have kids) so it’s not the publicity thing that makes me want to chuck it all out the window…

    for me it’s the handmade shop. I love it, I absolutely do, but I work full-time and most of the time, I am ex.hausted. somedays i wonder if i am just absolutely bananas.

  • oops! meant to say, that I don’t think I’m that public– I mean I share thoughts, but I don’t really share deep feelings or struggles… so I don’t struggle with that part.

  • Do you remember the movie the Truman Show? I feel like we put our kids on a sort of reality show and they have no clue:) I think it’s weird but still do it

  • I feel like this fairly often myself- and it’s the reason I needed a couple months off over the summer. I was uninspired and wasn’t enjoying blogging. It was feeling like a chore- something I never wanted to happen. I struggle often with how much I want to share on my blog and now that I’m going to be having a kid soon I think about it even more. How much do I want him/her to appear, do I want to show his/her face, or should that part of my life be kept private? It’s such a strange world that we’re in.
    PS… I’m glad that you haven’t quit yet. I enjoy your blog so much because you’re REAL.

  • I admire people that blog for a living but I just couldn’t do it. I have a personal blog where I document the lives if my two boys. That is private and doing that is fun and now I’d like to take it into print form as a way to save it but that itself is a challenge. I love how you’re able to share your family and all the things that you admire and love. It’s fun reading your point of view but I don’t blame you about how you almost quit.nit has to be tough. Whatever you decide to do with your blog, whatever changes you make, it all a process.

  • i agree that it takes a lot to live publicly and be a blogger, sharing so much, all the time… but i think that i’ve always lived that way. i’ve always shared a lot with people and been open. i think blogging just falls right into that spectrum of behavior. i wouldn’t want to live in a way where i couldn’t connect with others and openly share.

    you’re brave for blogging with kids though, that would always worry me. they will be children of a social media generation, that’s for sure, with-or-without the blog.

    kw ladies in navy

  • Yep, I often feel like throwing the computer out the window! But so much of it is fulfilling and great. But yeah, if I knew this is how busy I’d be before I started blogging, would I still have done it??? Maybe not, but I think that would have been a shame, since I know I’ve created (and will create) amazing things! You, too!!!

  • THIS. I have this exact post drafted and re drafted like 5 times. It’s been a huge struggle for me for the past few months. For me, the party will probably stop a little while after having kids. Publicly. I get the wanting to have something your kids find one day, but that doesn’t mean your blog has to be public. I’ve seen some scary nasty things on the web that scares me too much in regards to kids. I think you do a brilliant job of balancing, for the record. I don’t think you over share your kids at all. When you do decide to unplug ihod, I will probably be close behind you. Right now I’ve pulled back and am trying to regroup and really see where I want this to go. I’ve never been one who enjoys being front and center, I much prefer to fly under the radar of life so I’m wih you on feeling over exposed and burned out.

  • I totally understand where you are coming from! I’ve had that urge once in a month too. Things get a lot overwhelming and i’m a melancholic mind just like you ๐Ÿ™‚

    Somethings some just simply end! or not! good luck to whatever you do in your life

  • Thank you for your honest post!! I always try to strike a balance with how much I share about my personal life. I know what I share about Olive will change as she gets older… For now I think she’ll enjoy looking back on the milestones that I do chronicle on the blog. xo

  • OMG! I totally get where you are coming from. All my free time is dedicated to my blog. I have to pay close attention to what I miss out on because of it. Let’s not even talk about the viral picture that I was telling you about. I keep thinking to myself… what have I done! It’s making me take a step back and look at everything.

  • I am only a reader but I deeply respect bloggers. I am amazed at the personal sacrifices bloggers make. The idea of blogging is attractive but the part that scares me is the privacy. I don’t think I could personally do it but I am so grateful for all the folks that do. I wonder if bloggers know how much they inspire people and make people feel better about themselves every day. I really enjoy your blog – I would understand if you decide to depart but I would really miss this blog! Thanks for sharing what you do and inspiring me!

  • I completely agree, which is why I took a huge step back from blogging after having by second child. I still read my favorite blogs and I still think about blogging all the time, but I also enjoy just living life and not worrying about capturing every single moment to share publicly.

  • My two little cents as a reader…
    I completely understand your concern for your children’s privacy, safety and pulling back on sharing the more personal stories; I think it’s only natural. The internet seems to be one gigantic exclamation point these days with every voice out there – counseling, creative, needy, opinionated, etc. – hence why I tend to be picky about the blogs I follow and generally stick with the positive, real and aesthetic.
    If it’s any consolation to you, Anna, even if you dwindled your posts down to a once a week note on fashion, fun finds or what I should see the next time I’m in Georgia, I’d still subscribe. Thanks for stickin’ with it!

  • I don’t blog, so I can offer advice from that perspective! I do love reading what people write, though. And I think there is a place for talented writers like you. You’ve created a niche blog with the fashion and the photography that allows you to be able to share as little or as much about your family as you want. I know lots of bloggers who, as their children have gotten older, tend to write more general posts about faith and family, rather than specific posts about their kids. I think this holds true especially for people whose kids are middle school and high school age. Those kids can read their blog and the Moms tend to err on the side of protecting their privacy. Which is the right thing to do.

  • This resonates so much with me too, Anna! Especially as of late. I’ve gone from wanting to rename my blog to debating whether I should even keep it, and I’m having a battle of wills per say, also not knowing which direction to take. It’s also a matter of taking away quality time with Noah and my husband. As you already know and stated, blogging takes alot of work. Sure it does feed your creative appetite, but it can also deplete it if one is not careful. I haven’t wanted to admit it out loud because there are days where I truly love blogging and I get excited to share what my little family is up to but I also have an internal conflict wondering if I’m parading my child out on the internet too much. Lately it’s also feeling more and more like a chore and I just feel uninspired on a whole. It’s not like me to feel like this, so I’ve thought of taking a step back and re-evaluate what’s truly important. I’ve lost a little of what I used to love about blogging plus the fact that I haven’t started blogging full-time really has me at odds. I know if and when the time comes, it will be the right decision for you and your family but I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t miss your posts. But then again, there’s always Instagram right? ๐Ÿ™‚ xoxo

  • Great post dear. I also feel the same many times though my blog is not as big as yours. Sometimes blogging feels so much time and energy consuming. I feel like quitting. But after few hours, my mood will change again and I will start thinking about my next post, Blame it all on blogging. It is addictive when you take it the right way.

    I am happy that you have decided to continue doing this for now. good luck dear.

    cheers,
    Janika

  • […] I share so many of Anna’s thoughts in this post. It’s hard finding the right […]

  • I think it’s possible to live privately and still blog, but it comes with a handful or MORE of challenges. I blog privately…in a way. My blog is public, but none of my friends know I blog (just family). I don’t share photos of myself or my child or our family. And while I think it sometimes limits the growth of my blog, it’s a privacy I enjoy keeping, even if it means a blog that reaches a smaller audience.
    xo
    Eleanor

  • Oh, Anna, this resonates so much with me! When I started my blog a few months ago, I wanted to keep my personal life private, which I feel like I’ve been doing well with, but it’s hard. It’s hard to blog and engage with your readers if you keep things impersonal. So right now I’m trying to find a balance between the two, and I’m actually feeling a little lost with this whole thing. Thank you for honesty, Anna. I absolutely love your blog!! I know you’ll know when it’s time for you to part with blogging, but until then (like you said) enjoy this crazy adventure! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Happy Weekend! xo

  • Hi Anna,

    I really enjoyed reading your post on whether or not to continue Blogging. I initially started it as a hobby, a way of doing something with my random musings & photographs. Part of you thinks, really? Should I do this? Nobody is going to read it anyway so why not. But then you see bloggers who are really successful & think well maybe I should give up because I’m not as good as them. One of the reasons might possibly be because I don’t share much of myself on there, sure I share stories & events, photographs etc but I don’t put my family, or even myself on there. Maybe I care too much about what people think but there’s also the privacy issue. You should be interested in someone for their talent and how inspirational they are to their audience, not because you want to compare yourself to the girl in the photographs with the latest Phillip Lim handbag. Sure I would love to be more successful but I would like to obtain it in a way that is more comfortable to me. You’re right that finding the balance is so hard. Maybe one day you find a balance you get comfortable with but I’m just going to keep writing & enjoy blogging for the few readers I do have!

    Natasha x

  • Girl, you hit the nail on the head with this one. This is the best, but hardest job I’ve ever had! But you have all of us behind you and loving everything you do, so keep it up!

    xo

  • I’d like to think of myself as the {far less successful} Michael Jordan of blogging. I quit and stage a comeback on a quarterly basis.

  • Oh my goodness… I battle with these thoughts as well.
    I am a new again mom and feel that I spend every quiet second trying to come up with blog content, but the second is over before I can put two sentences together. Is it worth telling my kids “momma just needs 5 more seconds” “please please… just 5 more minutes!”? For now, I will stick with it, but I do have to ask when my online life will end! You are quite established! Don’t give up now!

  • Hi Anna, I have been following you in Instagram and Twitter for a few months – and stumble onto certain blog posts here and there. I always wonder how moms blog – the past three years of my blogging life have been in an unmarried relationship with no children and very few people to think about exposing, other than myself. I am now engaged, house hunting and plan to have as many children as I am able ๐Ÿ™‚ Last Friday, I shut down my blog after three crazy years – and I did it mostly because I want a private life again and I want one now more than ever. I want to instagram things and tweet things like my friends do – like my wedding plans and my wedding and then my new home and then my children and their happy moments – but only randomly with no catch, with no links, with no strangers peering in. It was so hard to finalize that decision, but I found your post today and felt better immediately. Maybe because you share my feelings and put them so well – or maybe just knowing I’m not alone in that feeling. I just wanted to let you know, XO Jenna

  • […] it is also an extension of who I am. They seem to butt heads sometimes. To refresh your memory, I almost quit blogging altogether every […]

  • […] things happen. Even if my motivation was my family, I was getting worn thin. As you remember with this post and this post, I was sensing a turning point for this blog, but I wasn’t quite sure […]

  • It’s bittersweet to read this. I’m no where near what I would call an ‘experienced’ blogger but I’ve contemplated backing out completely several times so it’s reassuring to know that an experienced blogger like you feels the need to step away from time to time. And while I would completely understand if you did, I have just recently stumbled across your blog and I already know I would miss it! I get scared sometimes that I’m sharing too much on my blog, but then I think about some of my most favorite lifestyle blogs and I think about how much they have inspired me and how, even if they have no idea, I feel like they are a friend, someone I can relate to. It just wouldn’t be the same, not being able to follow along with the lives of some of my favorite people. I think there’s a thin line between sharing enough and sharing too much and I definitely struggle with it more and more as we get closer to starting a family. And for me, blogging is just a hobby right now, I have a full time 9-5 cubicle job and I dedicate some spare time to my blog whenever I can. I won’t lie, I would absolutely love it if things could take off and producing content could be a full time gig for me. But at the same time, I feel like the blogging world sprouted quickly and so I feel that it may end quickly. I’m afraid of being the last kid to show up at the party, just as everyone else is leaving, and then what will I do? I feel a length blog post coming on, I need a heart to heart session. ๐Ÿ™‚

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